no.

Thu, 01 Jan 2004 19:16:46 GMT

new lj.

i don't really feel like linking it.
the name is fuckandfight.

oh and uh, happy fucking new year.

Sun, 14 Dec 2003 19:59:33 GMT

sakhsdfjskfhkasjhdfkasjdnaskdjasfhkasjhaskjhsakdja PARDON ME NOT UPDATING FOR LIKE A ZILLION YEARS.

i don't know what to say.

ew, i'm going to school in january.
ewwwwww.

oh well.

asifjsljkfhaksjfhaskjfaksf.

jdahskjahd

Fri, 24 Oct 2003 20:10:41 GMT

alright. this anonymous posting crap is getting a little annoying.

not because people should "reveal" themselves or whatever, just because i want to know who's had my back.

i'm not going to disable anonymous posting, because i have friends who comment but don't have a journal.
but, if you're going to post about me and not leave any clue of who you are. i'd appreciate it if you'd im me, or something. it'd be confidential, and that's a promise.

thanks.
bye.

Fri, 24 Oct 2003 09:59:59 GMT

disregard all the crap that's been going on in my life.

i don't have a say in it.

i hope each and every one of you knows that he and i never broke up.
in fact, i'm talking to him on the phone this very second.

and that all the crap you've said, or thought, or anything, for that matter.. means nothing, it's useless.
this is my personal life, so i'm not going to type this out in great extent.
but we are together. and we are happy.

as if you cared.
and for those of you that do care, thank you.
night.
<3

Sun, 19 Oct 2003 07:22:06 GMT

me.
him.
we.
us.
perfect.
love.

dsjflkdjsafljshkljhewiohsnldasnld.

dasfjalksjfalskjdalskdjaslkdaslkdjafaf

Sat, 18 Oct 2003 23:59:18 GMT

djaklsdakls.
within
the
next
hour.
erik
is
going
to
be
here.
djsfkajda.

stolen from nathan.

Sat, 18 Oct 2003 03:35:59 GMT

name: stella.
do you like it?: sure.
nicknames: you.
screen names: ooh explode, shes such a dyke, lak SO pxnk rawk, neon in the 80s, murder equals, disco is in baby, holyfxckimSCENE, cherry rum sugar, screamedit, missawesomepants, shes a scenester, bloodisSOpasse, shepoisonedyou
birthday: june 20th
sign: gemini
location: twinsburg, ohio
school: homeschooled
status: taken
crush: on erik? yes.
virgin?: it's unladylike to speak of such things!
natural hair color: blondish brown or something.
current hair color: pink//black
eye color: blue//green//grey
height: 5'7
birthplace: fortworth, tx
shoe size: 8

[family]

parents: asshole & sue
siblings: none
live with: parents
favorite relative: my cousin julia

[favorites]

number: numbers are overrated.
color: red.
day: it's saturday; wooo woooooo.
month: october.
song: music is SO passe.
movie: fight club, maybe.
food: soft pretzels or something.
band: the sjuhfkdjshakjdfs.
sport: checkers.
class: art?
teacher: loliez michael jordan.
drink: water.
veggie: carrots.
tv show: i dislike tv. but, early morning cartoons<3.
radio station: z107.9; latest in hiphop and r&b. i like the black people in the commercials who try to sound all angry but you don't know what they're saying. some would say it's much like hardcore.
store: heinen's.
animal: kitty. rofflez.
flower: i dislike all flowers but t3h r053.
state: new york.

[this or that]

me/you: me because i'm elite and you're not hardcore. pussy.
coke/pepsi: sprite.
day/night: night plz.
aol/aim: aim.
cd/cassette: cd
dvd/vhs: does it really matter? no.
jeans/khakis: jeans.
car/truck: i do not care.
tall/short: gargantuous.
lunch/dinner: i do not eat lunch.
nsync/bsb: um nsync. duh.
gap/old Navy: they're expensive but old navy jeans fit me the best.
lipstick/lipgloss: chapstick.
silver/gold: depends on how much.
alcohol/weed: ew, neither.

[love and relationships]

do you have a bf/gf?: erik.
how long have you liked him/her?: two and a half months, about.
why do you like this person?: actually. love. kthnx.
if you're single: what?
if you're not single... give details...: ...whaaaat?
how long was your longest relationship?: eleven months.
how long was your shortest relationship?: nine months.
who was your first love?: adam mcgillen. r.i.p.
what do you miss about them?: basically everything. it'd be nice just to see him again.

[the past ]
what is the one thing you would change about your past?: why dwell on it, it's not going to happen.
last thing you heard: keys clicking, water spraying.
last thing you saw: i'm staring at the screen?
last thing you said: "yeah, it was cold. i'm sick now."
who is the last person you saw?: mom.
who is the last person you kissed?: a lady does not kiss&tell.
who is the last person you fought with?: fighting is for posers.
who is the last person you were on the phone with? amanda.
what is the last tv show you saw?: school of rock. ha
what is the last song you heard?: here in my car.

[the present]

what are you wearing?: pj bottoms, blood brothers tshirt, grey hoodie.
what are you doing?: ...
who are you talking to?: antisocial. how punk.
what song are you listening to?: some weird soap opera music on the tv my dad is watching.
are you online?: why, no. i'm not. because i wouldn't be doing this if i were online. asshat.
how are you feeling?: cold, sick, sore.
are you in a chatroom?: uh no.

[future]

what day is it tomorrow?: saturday. i get to see erik ;DD
what are you going to do after this?: i do not know.
who are you going to talk to?: probably erik.
how old will you be when you graduate? eighteen.
what is one of your dreams?: i usually don't remember them but i have been lately but i don't really care to type it out.
where will you be in 25 years?: um. i don't know.

[other ]

do you write in cursive or print?: print.
are you a lefty or a righty?: lefty. LOLZ ARTIZTYK
what is your sexual preference?: girls&boys. ROFFLEZ DATZ A GC SAWNG!
what piercings do you have?: um. is that the only thing that anyone ever cares about?
any tattoos?: bye.
do you drive?: no.
do you have glasses or braces?: nein.
did you like this survey?: am i supposed to? are you aiming to please?
what do you most like about your body?: i don't really pick favorites regarding my body.?
how many fillings do you have?: none.
do you think you're good looking?: not really.
do other people often tell you that you're good-looking?: sometimes.
do you look like any celebrities?: kelly osbourne?

[fashion ]

do you wear a watch?: if i need to.
how many coats and jackets do you own?: three.
favorite pants/skirt color?: brown or jeans.
most expensive item of clothing?: i do not know.
most treasured?: nothing?.
what kind of shoes do you wear?: converse.

k bye.

um, okay.

Tue, 14 Oct 2003 10:20:40 GMT

you are either a record nerd or not a scenester at
all. you are the coolest of the bunch. bravo,
dude.

what type of lame scenester are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

same as ashley. we must be ultra fucking cool or something. ;/

edit: we are mega ultra fucking cool.

grah.

Tue, 14 Oct 2003 10:05:47 GMT

tonight was a horrible fucking night.

i'm sorry for not calling.

i'm sorry for everything.
i feel like giving up if tomorrow isn't better.

well.
bye.

hm. it's cold. WINTER APPAREL.

Mon, 13 Oct 2003 07:40:14 GMT

kbye.;)

dkhsdkj

Mon, 13 Oct 2003 02:45:12 GMT

yeah, so i still have some to do yet.
like links to my info&friends. but until then..
me.
them.

and i was looking through all of my old pictures.
i found one i liked;

that is all.

wow, i get bored too easily.

Sun, 12 Oct 2003 19:50:10 GMT

grah, fuck this.

styles are so hard, how the fuck do you people do it.
jfgdhsjkghakjfgakdhfakdhfgdjghabdga.

thanks, bye.

NOOOHNDKAJHSNadh

Fri, 10 Oct 2003 15:55:24 GMT

i heard.
from a friend.
that dan from anah aevia is quitting the band.
dkhfasjfhaskjahkdjshdkajd.
i can die now.

bye.

Thu, 09 Oct 2003 21:51:06 GMT

someone give me three hundred dollars.

thanks, bye.

grah.

Thu, 09 Oct 2003 00:46:20 GMT

went out.
got stuff.
came home.
getting lectured, but not by my parents.
thanks.

bye.

ah.

Mon, 06 Oct 2003 01:17:16 GMT

just got back from running.

first it was a walk. then a jog. then i fucking sprinted and didn't stop. god. it felt so good.
apples are extremely wonderful.
i'm naming my firstborn apple.

so. last night.
i went to six flags with amanda.
it was fun. amanda's new boyfriend is alice cooper.
it was also very cold.
then amanda came over and we decided to pig out. we made a bunch of food. and then, i ate like. a cookie and a granola bar and a slice of apple.
but i still felt like a pig.
so today i decided to stop fucking snacking, because that's what's making me gain weight. and to go for at least a half hour run every night after dinner. and to replace at least one of my meals with an apple.
an apple, at average, takes less than a hundred steps to burn off.
soooo good.
and much better than starving myself.
i also need to start getting more social. doing something once a week is not going to cut it. that's so lame.
especially since i'm not going to school.

well. that's it, really.
byeeeee<3.

shut up. i just felt like pictures.

Sun, 05 Oct 2003 23:57:43 GMT

okay, bye.

Sun, 05 Oct 2003 09:29:13 GMT

so tired.
so cold.
so filled with fucking love.

i would kill to have you here.
and knowing it's happening makes my stomach knot.

i miss you.
and it's not fair that you have to miss me too.

don't leave.

i'm sorry.

Fri, 03 Oct 2003 22:57:18 GMT

ooh explode: UHDSKAGHDAKJHDGAJHFAKDJHAFDKA
in an outline: what?
ooh explode: okay my cousin is coming over
ooh explode: like now or something
ooh explode: and then someone else is coming over
ooh explode: or something.
ooh explode: so.
in an outline: ..so
in an outline: ?
ooh explode: i have no idea like, what i can do
in an outline: about what?
in an outline: fine
ooh explode: my mom can't take us anywhere
in an outline: are you just saying this or do you not want to go to six flags?
ooh explode: no, i'm serious
in an outline: what do you mean she can't take you ANYWHERE? six flags is 2.5 seconds away from my house.
in an outline: she doesn't even have to drive
ooh explode: she has to help someone carry shat into the basement and then she's shopping
in an outline: why didn't you just tell me you didn't want to go? thanks. i hope i get shot when i walk there. bye.

i didn't think i was that bad of a friend.
but i really couldn't help it. she can't take us.

i guess i was wrong.

maybe i should just stay in my room for the rest of my life. and then i won't be bothering anyone.

sigh.

Fri, 03 Oct 2003 19:01:52 GMT

i fell asleep last night on the phone with erik.
again.

god i feel sorry for that boy.
good thing i don't snore. :D

hm, i feel like a new layout.

oh. and i called erik this morning because he told me to.
and there's a new girl at his work who wants his cock.
WHATEVER.

anyways. i'm bored, it's three oclock.
so. yeah.
maybe i'll start that layout now.

bye.

Fri, 03 Oct 2003 05:12:43 GMT

WTF@MY COMMENTS NOT SHOWING UP

gaaaahhhh.

Fri, 03 Oct 2003 02:26:43 GMT

well. um, i guess a lot has happened in the past few days? actually. no. but. whateverrr.

last night i made a shirt, it says "dude, i'm so hardcore" on the front and "ninjaz r kewl" on the back. inspired by john, who is amazingly funny. so i called amanda and we talked for like an hour while i was making the shirt and i couldn't figure out which side i was supposed to put the letters down. ;/ but then i got it. and alright, think about this. i can be stupid. and on the directions it said to cover the letters with a PRESS CLOTH while ironing them. so i was trying to figure out what the fuck a PRESS CLOTH was. and amanda and i decided that the term PRESS CLOTH was rather amusing when used in the sentence; "where the fuck is my PRESS CLOTH?" especially when said in a foreign accent. and then amanda had thursday stuck in her head. so she kept repeating "put sex onn the radiooo." and then i yelled "no" but it sounded like "nyew." thanks. then we called john. and then frankie, amanda's brother was being an ass. so she had to go. but that was fun.

and then later, i called francis. and francis threewayed tam. and i threewayed tracey. and tracey threewayed jer. and it was fun. and then francis's phone got too hot(?) or something and he had to go. and then he called back a few minutes later and we had a long talk. i got a lot off my chest. he's a good friend. <3.

and then i got back online and erik was all pissed at me because like four hours were missing on the phone card. but i only used like half an hour to call trace. i doubt he believes me, but whatever. and then we got into an argument but all is good now. he's coming here in two weeks.

then today i talked to sara, who i haven't seen in almost half a year. which is odd because we live in the same town and twinsburg is by no means big. she updated me on all the kids who used to make fun of me who now think they're emo or punk or goth or something.

she said there were no hardcore kids here. i don't know if she'd be able to recognize them. but. sigh.

then i made another shirt; "i have a crush on every boy."
thank you, tgs.

then i went to therapy, and she was showing me her pen collection because i wouldn't talk. i told her it was stupid to have that Operation game on a pen. or etchasketch. or a sea monkey holder. i mean, what the hell, they're pens.

she told me to lighten up.
what does that mean?

then i went in the waiting room while she talked to my mom about school.

there was this old guy there. he was staring at me. he told me i was pretty.

i wanted to leave. i was scared.

then he fell asleep and started moaning. ;\

i made a loud sigh and he woke up all like "i wasn't snoring, was i?"
i'm like, "uh. no."
and then he started telling me about his pets.

i really wanted to leave.

but that was okay because then my mom came out and we left.
and then i came home. that's all.

bye.

oh.

Wed, 01 Oct 2003 22:19:08 GMT

and i have a new screen name. for aim or whatever.

missawesomepants
don't stalk me.

bye.

rwrughlifjg

Wed, 01 Oct 2003 16:02:38 GMT

i fuck things up. a lot.

i'm sorry.

you know who you are.

so.

Mon, 29 Sep 2003 23:07:26 GMT

i went to see the new psychologist today.

she thought i was on drugs, or something.

she kept saying. "Now, you know it's okay to tell me, I won't hold anything against you, ever."

I DO NOT DO DRUGS >;\

she must have asked me fourteen or fifteen times.
no, i'm serious.

and then she flips out at me;
"I'M THE ONLY ONE YOU CAN TRUST, TELL MEEE!!!!"
and then starts asking about sex.

ugh.
so i left. :D

bye.